Direct questions

It is part of being human to have questions, thoughts and a lot of feelings about [x]. How can you have more answers, educated guesses, certainty and informed feelings based on ideas and knowledge?

Ask direct questions clears the air

If you ask someone a direct question you will have a better understanding of what you have to do, know and think. How can you do this?

Home life
Asking who wants dinner today will allow you to make sure you put enough on. Remember to be direct and specific when asking home life questions. Who wants dinner is different than who wants dinner in an hour.
Work life
Asking what format your organisation uses for reports will allow you to produce a very good report. Are you stuck on a task in work? Ask another employee “how do I…”.
What are you stuck on? Ask someone a direct question based on this.
Personal life
Are you thinking about what someone said? Ask them what did they mean by [what they said]. Being direct does not mean you will argue it clears the air. Remember that you can agree to disagree!

Tact and situation

There will be times when direct questions are inappropriate (see the comment below this blog post) so you will need to use you instinct and decide whether or not a direct question is suitable. Like life itself there must be a balance and it is up to you to find this happy medium, if you like, to do ask the right type of question in any given situation.

Direct questions are great because they usually have direct answers. Direct questions are also specific, thus clear. Be specific, within the question, name the person you are speaking to and put a realistic time-frame within the question.

Directness works in all aspects of your life. Having direct answers allows you to understand something better. If you can understand something you are likely to enjoy it, be happy and thought-free.

What to do whenever you have a bad day

Bad days happen to everyone. There are no exceptions to this: you, your neighbour, your cousin may not suffer from a depressive illness, but they are likely to have suffered from a bad day. A bad day doesn’t mean the end of the world. A bad day can be difficult to control, especially if we get caught up in the moment of deep thought(s). What can you do to make a bad day a bad few hours: what can you do to shorten this normal, yet unwanted experience?

listen to your favourite song
music is a very powerful tool to help us through difficult times. Music can also allow us to really enjoy a good moment — see just how powerful music is? Remember the music: hear it everywhere post, or, music, music, music post?
store your favourite text messages for easy retrieval
Do you ever get a text that makes you smile? Keep it, store it. You can do this by taking a screen shot of a text. Reading that same text can allow you to experience those good feelings, even if you don’t think you can enjoy them.
Look at pictures of you with your family, or friends (or/and your pet animal)
Actually look at the people in your life. You know all of them, I bet you can think of a really memorable moment with each and every one!
Get in touch, stay connected
Text, ring or speak to your friend(s) about normal things. Do not sit by yourself all day, get up and go — get in touch with people.

Bad days happen, they’re a part of life

Just remember that your bad day will not last forever. Your good feelings (such as the great feeling you got from a text message, for example) will be back soon. A bad day does not last forever!

What do you do? What else can you suggest?

Technology: a reflection on this machine

A few weeks ago I returned to work within my universities’ largest library, were I work in IT Support. Over the summer they have done a lot of renovations, so much so, the same building looks completely new! But behind the exterior there are a lot of cables and a mass number of coloured screens: technology is used everywhere in the new library.

A human take on technology

I am passionate about technology. I don’t think I spend much time without it, this could be reading the news on my mobile ‘phone, or, catching up on an interesting video clip on-line. But technology doesn’t always get everything (remember the why technology gets it wrong post?), does it?

Technology does not get feelings

I was talking to a Librarian about the new gadgets within the library, as well as the use of technology in other sectors. It was interesting how we both agreed on a few points:

Technology is removing that human touch.
Self-service scanners / checkouts are putting human beings, us! out of jobs.
Electronic stores (such as the example of a bike store below) don’t allow us to have feelings with something.
Photo of an electronic bike store (inhabitat.com)

Photo of an electronic bike store (inhabitat.com)

Do you ever pick a fresh fruit over another fruit, even if it’s the same fruit, in the same container/basket?
We like to make connections with what we do. Now I am not saying we all have relationships with fruit (or another piece of food), for example, but I am trying to illustrate that as humans, this connection is important. This human touch allows us to think that we have just purchased a really good apple, for example.
We cannot form a relationship with a store
Electronic equipment is cutting the number of human beings within stores. But what about that little conversation we used to have with the cashier? We cannot form relationships with technology: technology is removing human beings from the ‘real’ world.
Technology does not cloud emotions
If a store’s closing up, the chances are that you will still get the item you are looking for are high. A shop owner is likely to let you quickly grab and buy an item, even if s/he is closing-up. With computers, they are either yes or no. As soon as it’s 18:00:00, for example, all transactions stop. Emotions are not taken into account.

Caring technology

Technology does not care, as such. It may be used within caring environments, such as a hospital, for example. But technology does not do feelings, nor is it likely to do so in the future. At least in the world in which we operate today!

Some blurs of emotions and technology do exist today, but they are not really used in everyday, real life. For example, smile detection on cameras enables the camera to take a photograph whenever a person smiles, but the same camera does not know how to associate this with feelings: camera’s do not know that smiling means happiness. It just knows to take a picture whenever we smile.

Do you care about technology, even if it doesn’t care about you?

Why we shouldn’t hate

The Oxford English Dictionary defines the word ‘hate’ as:

intense dislike … feelings of hate and revenge

Hate is a strong and powerful feeling

If you hate someone, or something, you have very strong, intense feelings about a thing or a person. It is just as strong as loving someone, or something. So why do you want to begrudge something, or someone so much?

Dislike is better than hate

You might not always agree with someone, or you might not like the physical look of an object (something), but whatever it may be, having hate for something, or someone is a very powerful, strong, intense feeling from you – the hater. It’s the opposite of love!

If you dislike someone, or something instead, you don’t have strong feelings for them, or it, if it’s an object. Does having strong feelings for something, or someone also mean you really like them? Perhaps it does. Does disliking someone, or something mean that you do not have strong feelings for them/it? Maybe so.

Try to get by, don’t have hate in your mind – it’s too strong, it isn’t that good, and it’s (usually) not worth it. Why show someone, or something an intense feeling if you really do not care that much about them / it?

Post 86, over and out